It is crazy to justify our anger and fears we carry, especially because in most cases, it is not part of our reality anymore, the current reality we are in. Pain that we hold on to, and that happened in the past still lives only in our mind. It is up to us to decide for how long. When we accept the true that a past event already happened, and that we cannot change it, we can slowly give it up as an excuse for the current wrongs in our life.

I realized, in my life, that suffering is costly….

By believing in suffering we give up the freedom we need the most. Any rejection of forgiveness and the need to keep the pain is actually an attack on us. Is it not enough others hurt us? Is it necessary for us to hurt ourselves as well? The first step in overcoming the suffering is realizing that it isn’t and it never will be a solution. If you recognize yourself in some of this it is important to realize that the next important step is to forgive. Forgiveness releases you from the suffering from the past, and gives you back the freedom you deserve and that you desperately need if you want to do something with your life.

Maybe it will sound weird, but you will agree that one part of you still wants to keep the suffering, and the other wants to release it. You are in a tough situation in which you feel powerless, tired and restricted. On one side, you blame others for injustice they have committed and you condemn their behavior, and on the other side you are torturing yourself with such toxic thoughts. That is the way it will be until you change your perception of forgiving.

The decision which can change our life…

Pain is, just as I described in my book ‘Stronger than pain’ just a temptation and if we keep it with us for too long, it becomes something of an obstacle on our path to wellbeing, our peace and healing. Pain is a clear reminder that we are in a great inner conflict, and that feeling doesn’t have anything to do with people, situations and events of the past. When we realize that we are renewing the feeling over and over again, it will be easier to overcome it, whatever it is. But not by pretending nothing happened, or to forget and justified others behavior. On the contrary, we must accept that it happened, and we must decide that that person, event or situation will not have any further influence on our lives.

Forgiveness can change our life. Forgiveness overshadows all that is visible and goes to some new and bigger truth. Have in mind that nothing can really hurt you except your own thoughts. If you wish to free yourself from suffering, anger, cynicism, dissatisfaction, criticism, jealousy, wounded past and your unnecessary luggage you carry with yourself, than you need to forgive.  

People often ask me ‘How to forgive’. By giving up on the idea that you can change anything in your past, and by stopping with rewinding of the same story whatever it is. In that way you will open the space for forgiveness. You need to clear your mind and teach it to work for you. Our thoughts are sometimes full of fear, self condemning, expectations, doubts and other destructive patterns.  Nothing can get us in trouble as fast as our own thoughts. Also, nothing can bring us back to balance as our own thoughts.

If only it was different….

Why do we keep and incite the pain, and why do we attack our own personality and keep hurting ourselves over and over again? When a situation happens and we feel as a victim, we start an inner dialogue, a conflict that lasts far longer than what really happened. Remember those situations when you keep rewinding for days in your head and think what you should have said to that person. We are often unaware how long we do that that at one moment that way of thinking becomes the only option for us, and grows to be our only truth.

A friend for life…

Forgiveness plays a huge role in every healing and is a key to successful relationship, career, prosperity and a fulfilled life. Every one of us has a lot that needs to be gone and forgiven, even thought it maybe seams that you are special, and that you suffered the unforgivable, we all face that.

It is wonderful to be positive, but it is even better to accept your feelings and forgive. Life offers us an opportunity to pass through all kinds of experiences not to be angry and exasperated, but to mature, become stronger and go stronger and readier to the new levels of learning and progress. And that is why, free yourself from everything you don’t need, and choose to be gentle and mild to yourself while you are stepping trough life. Act towards yourself as towards a friend that you love a lot, and that you care about. Help him free himself from his past and remind him that he is capable of overcoming everything. Learn to be your own support just as you would be to the ones you care about the most. Then, you will be free! Then, you will start to live! Then you will start a journey of your own prosperity.

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Koliko često upiremo prste u druge, pokušavajući da na taj način opravdamo svoju nemoć, bez obzira što smo u potpunosti svesni da to nema nikakvog efekta. Igrajući ulogu žrtve mi samo dodatno povređujemo sebe, produbljujemo svoj bol i zatvaramo vrata mogućnostima koje su pred nama.

Da li nam je zaista potreban bol iz prošlosti da nas i dalje povređuje?

Odgovor na ovo pitanje nalazi se u mojoj novoj knjizi ‘Jači od bola’ koju sam i napisao upravo inspirisan iskustvom mojih klijenata koji su imali različite simpotme ali uvek isti uzrok – bol. Svako od nas poseduje sopstveni arsenal alata sa kojima izlazimo na kraj u najrazličitijim životnim situacijima. Jedno nam je svima zajedničko – svako od nas nosi nepotreban teret iz prošlosti. Zar nije strašno tegliti taj bol iz prošlosti kao da je i dalje stvaran i kao da samo čekamo da će ponovo iskočiti ispred nas?

Umesto da se pripremamo za zlo, šta bi bilo kada bismo poverovali u dobro?

Svi smo iskusili bol i svi ga nosimo. Osećamo i na taj način održavamo u životu. U našem životu. Bol koji je prisutan kod nas, ne mora da znači da je prihvaćen kao opšti bol koji svako nosi na svojim leđima. Čak i kada je u našoj priči povezan sa nekim drugim ljudima, gotovo da sam siguran da oni nemaju nikakve veze sa njim. Bar ne nakon nekog dužeg perioda. Dakle, svi mi koračamo kroz život sa nekim svojim ranama. Neke smo sakrili osmehom, neke ispod odeće, neke duboko ispod karijere, a neke svakodnevno previjamo i čistimo. Nakon nekih rana ostali su ožiljci koji će nas zauvek podsećati na nešto ili pak ožiljci koji će nam zauvek biti dokaz da smo preživeli nešto mnogo strašno. Ožiljak je tu da probudi staru ranu ili da nam ukaže na našu sopstvenu snagu. Bol je dakle ili najveći neprijatelj ili dokaz naše fascinantne moći.

Ako usvojite ovu ideju čitajući ovaj blog, znajte da vaš život može krenuti potpuno novim tokom. Odlukom da umesto bola odaberete motivaciju, vi u svom životu počinjete da primenjujete sve ono što ste do sada naučili iz knjiga, sa predavanja od raznih učitelja i duhovnih lidera.

Danas imate mogućnost da izbarete jedan od ova dva puta. I kada donesete odluku, budite sigurni da će svaka naredna biti u skladu sa njom. Izbor je toliko logičan da gotovo niko ne bi pomislio da odabere nešto drugačije, ali u trenucima kada se dešavaju krize, bolesti, patnja, važno je da osvestimo činjenicu da nije potrebno da reagujemo iz svoje rane, već iz svog srca. Bitno je da shvatimo kakav će rezultat dati naša reakcija i šta nam je to istinski potrebno. Da li zaista verujete da će uzvraćanje bola doneti dobro bilo kome? Da li verujete da će umnožavanje patnje nekome doneti radost?

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